MPDG

when you wake up and you are sort of in love with yourself

just woke up from a christmas day nap. Even though the holidays are made for noise, I still love the silence I can grant myself through a nap.

The thing about the Christmas Holiday is that it goes by so fast... and I'm not even talking about the gifts or whatever. I mean the actual time frame that the holiday of Christmas shifts to focus on New Years goes by super fast. Technically it is still Christmas, the 25th, but I'm already thinking about New Years, my plans and my lists of the good, the bad and the change.

I will probably post a separate post on my "Best of 2010's"

For the rest of 2010 though, I'd like to finish reading my novel. I hate how reading makes me so relaxed, that I fall asleep after reading like 3 pages. The book isnt even boring! I am just conditioned to fall asleep while reading. Add that to changes needed to be made in 2011.

xx

Quizzes for while i am in bed naked.

This is seriously going to get personal, you ready?

always

If you were caught cheating, would you fess up?

i wouldnt cheat. i would break up with the person first, then do whatever i wanted... but what i do after post break up, i may or may not disclose.

The last time you felt honestly broken?

over a year ago.

Are you craving something?

a lover

If you could have one thing right now what would it be?

moonay

Would you rather have ten kids, or none?

ten kids.

What do you hear right now?

florence

Is your bed against more than one of your walls?

in the corner, so two.

What’s on your mind right now?

this quiz pretty much

Are you there for your friends?

i like to think so... people like to ask me for advice, or confide in me... but sometimes dealing with other people's feelings is weird and i dont know what to do... but i try.

Last person to see you cry?

seriously crying? no idea.

laugh crying, probably my family.

What do you do when you get nervous?

google, sleep.

Be honest, do you like people in general?

people in general no... but i get by.

How old do you think you will be when you finally have kids?

late 20's early-mid 30's.

Does anyone completely understand you?

not ~completely~ but a good amount that is necessary. sometimes i dont even get me tbh.

Do you have a reason to smile right now?

yes. it's christmas.

Has anyone told you they don’t ever wanna lose you?

yes.

Would you be happier if life had a rewind button?

like curtis in the misfits? it would be good to change things that you didnt like... but i think once you have a taste of being able to change things... you'll just get greedy and never be happy. I am content with everything in my life thus far... id like to see how it turns out. But maybe...

Do you tell your mum or dad everything?

no

Does it matter to you if your boyfriend or girlfriend smokes?

Not really no.

Are you going to get hurt anytime soon by someone?

hopefully not

This time last year, can you remember who you liked?

no one

Do you think more about the past, present, or future?

present

How many hours of sleep do you get a night?

i try at at least get 6

Are you easy to get along with?

it depends on your personality and how well it meshes with mine.

Do you hate the last girl you had a conversation with?

lol no, thats my mom.

What was the last drink that you put in your mouth?

coke

What size bed do you have?

Queen duh

Do you start the water before you get in the shower or when you get in?

before. who does it otherwise?

Do you like the rain?

i love it.

Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

maybe. it would be nice.

Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t do?

of course. that's what life is right?

Would people refer to you as a goodie goodie, bad news, or neither?

LOL never a goodie goodie... but not bad news either.

Who were you last in the car with, besides family?

Hilary on a megabus

What’s the last movie you saw in theaters and with who?

Easy A? with a bunch of my gaybys

Have you ever kissed someone who had a boyfriend/ girlfriend?

Yep.

Have you ever been hurt by someone you never thought would hurt you?

yes, but i hurt him too... to be fair.

Your parents are out of town. Would you throw a massive party?

No.

Do you regret a past relationship?

absolutely no regrets

Would you rather spend a Friday night at a concert or a crazy party?

crazy party

Do you tend to fall for the same type of person over and over?

no.

Have you made a joke about somebody that made them cry?

probably

Do you care too much about your appearance?

not really. i wish i could obsess over my weight gain, but i really dgaf

Are you a jealous person?

yes

Have you bought any clothing items in the last week?

no

Do you miss anyone?

No.

Last person who made you cry?

the writers of HIMYM

Does your ex piss you off?

no.

What are you doing tomorrow?

working boxing day

Are you the type of person who has a new boyfriend/ girlfriend every week?

no

Is there anyone you want to come see you?

no, i really like being alone right now.

Have you ever been cheated on?

Never. I am too good to be cheated on.

Ever given your all to someone who walked away?

peut etre

Do you like cotton candy?

no

Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with?

Hilary at a bar, drunk, in NYC

Are you planning to get knocked up or knock someone up by age 17?

I am past 17

Do you have siblings?

a sister

Have you ever fallen asleep on someone?

family, friends

How has the past week been for you?

i was sick, i got better, i had christmas fun.

Do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?

yes, but i dont really like talking

What’s on your mind right now?

sleep

What were you doing at midnight last night?

opening gifts

What is your current mood?

tired

Who was the first person you talked to today?

my cousin RJ

Will this week be a good one?

hopefully

Anything happen to you within the past month that made you really happy?

saw my little man marvin

Who were you with last night?

my family

Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?

no

Next time you will kiss someone?

who knows!

Who should start the kiss, the girl or the boy?

the boy. show me chivalry isnt dead.

Do you have any plans for the weekend?

working boxing day

I see U, K.

Holidays are here!

Blogging 8 mins away from christmas day.

Only to deliver some not so good, but realistic news.

With my trip to NYC and holidays right after, it has been hard to keep up with my calorie counting.

But for the new year, i am dedicated to losing the weight i have gained because i hate seeing pictures of me, and i no longer have my hour glass figure... rather just a puffy ball.

going to visit the gym regularly during the school semester, as well as maintain a calorie deficit.

but as for now, the holidays are here, and im going to try and not indulge TOO MUCH.

hope you all are well,

happy holidays to you and yours.

xx

i am becoming such an anglophile

starting to use UK slang and phrases in my everyday speech... what's worse is that i say them in, what are my attempts at a British accent.

really considering moving there in the future.

this is a Nathan Young/Robert Sheehan Appreciation blog

so i will admit i have been slacking on the whole workout/fitness thing. mainly because of exams and the lot of it.

in the midst of school and whatever, i have become obsessed with this UK series called Misfits. I fell in love with one of the main characters of the show, as well as the actor who plays him.

Nathan/Robert, if he was in highschool, i would be writing love letters too in all my notebooks.

My cousins would agree that he is my type: tall, dark features, curly hair, twat, awesome sense of humor, and understated sense of style.... AND AN ACCENT?! UGH.

My obsession is borderline unhealthy, and i find myself crying over him and looking at flights to Ireland in attempts to snag him, or a look a like.

When i get back from NY im totes buying the dvd from ebay.

Day 4: Working out from home

So, I think I have finally committed to this working out and fitness thing. Having these online calculators that have numbers in front of me that help me visualize my goal.

So i started to count calories, which i hope sticks.

I dont know if im going to be going to the gym today, so i think i might have to do some in house working out.

Wish me luck :D

Goals

Since in about an hour it will be December (soooo crazy), i thought it would be a good idea to do a calorie deficit to try and speed up the weight loss.

If i do a 1000 calories a day with working out 3-5 times a week this would be the results:

If i stick to it, I could be at my goal weight (130) by March! Which isnt that far away. I extended the goals to include 120... but i dont know if that is a weight that i would want to venture, because I dont know if that weight would be suitable for my curves.

I am allowing myself to eat up to 1300, however would ideally like to cap it off at 1000 calories.

Thinking about cheat days with the holidays around.

Day 3 Workout

So this is my third day in a row going to the gym, im actually pretty proud of myself and my dedication.

My legs were pretty dead from the 2 days of straight cardio I had been doing, so i did less of that today, and more weights and mat work

So here is the rundown of the workout i did.

Treadmill: 5 mins (incline 15, speed 3.5)

Treadmill: 5 mins (incline 8, speed 4.0)

Treadmill: 5 mins (incline 0, speed 3-3.5)

Elliptical: 15 mins gluteal 1 setting

Rowing: 10 mins, manual setting

60 hip adductions

60 hip abductions

25 bicep curls

30 tricep lifts

30 lunges

some other arm thing using a machine i cant remember.

1 min 20 second plank pose

also thinking about counting calories. until next time!

Day 2 Workout

i went to the gym after work today, because i didnt go in the morning.

I did:

Treadmill: 20 mins (15 incline, speed 3-4)

Treadmill: 5 mins jogging (0 incline, speed4.5)

Elliptical: 15 mins (gluteal setting)

50 Crunches

25 Side crunches

20 Scissor kicks

Tomorrow, i plan on doing more cardio and an arms workout.

Weigh in on the weekend.

beginnings

i went to the gym today and got in a good cardio out.

unfortunately i had to face the scale today. the number is depressing, but i refuse to let it get to me.

so here are my beginning stats

SW: 165 lbs

CW: 165 lbs

UGW: 125-130

reflections at 12:25 am

I am perceived as a person who knows who she is, and I am. However, I often get glimpses of the people who I used to associate with... and I wonder about the person I once was.

I think about how I had such close bonds with these people, people that I only remember when I make the effort to. People that I have actively, and successfully, tried to forget.

I would agree that I know the person I am, and that I am in love with the person I am and the person I am becoming... but this transition is still in it's early stages so I am still dealing with the every "now and then" when I have these moments where I recollect on my life and my choices.

I think of it this way: If it is meant for us to be friends, it will be. It didnt work out for a reason, and I should not feel bad about it. Everyone is at different places in their lives, and those places dont include each other in the picture. If in the future our paths cross again, you know what? I'll deal with it then.

Right now, I'm focusing on the now. I can't be mentally occupied wondering what if this, what if that. Focusing on myself and the gorgeous person I am and will be.

In losing friends, I gained myself... and that is something I would never want to trade.

Teenage Dream

Just when I thought I couldn't get enough of this song.

i hate you so much, that it burns when i look at you

Do You Trust Your Friends?

Stars - Your Ex-Lover is Dead

I just discovered this alternate version of one of my favorite stars songs.

If it were possible to make me feel more of a wreck listening to this song... it is. I just spent about 20 minutes taking this in, and staring inadvertently into space.

deux moins

so me and my close friend have agreed to a 2 month challenge.

In which, we try and lose 20 pounds within 2 months.

I am scared i'll fail, but i really need to try.

I have been battling with my fluctuating weight for god knows how long.

I am to lose 40 pounds in total... maybe more depending.

I wont post before pictures just yet... but you'll definitely be hearing about my progress.

so won't you kill me? so i'll die happy.

the best summer song ever.

new ring and new nailpolish.

forgive the bitten nails on the one hand. it's been a stressful few weeks.

I know it's November

I can't remember when i first heard this song. but what i can remember is how it made me feel.

I had always loved the emotion and melodramatic nature of all The Smiths songs. This song was no exception.

I know it's over, is a song about a love that is not returned and the emotional consequences that come with it and eventually accepting that this love will ever be yours.

I personally, have never been in love... but i certainly do know what it feels like to know that something is over.